By Pauline Odhiambo
At 11 months old, Itumeleng Sekhu-Pedi was tucked away in bed at home in South Africa's Hammanskraal when a candle fixed to a nightstand fell over her.
The flames caught the warm fleece she had been wrapped in before burning through her dress to scorch her baby-soft skin. Inexplicably, she didn't cry.
When her mother and uncles smelt smoke from another room and rushed to save her, Itumeleng suffered major burns.
"When my mum picked me up, my right hand stayed on the bed. One of my ears was charred. I also lost four fingers on my left hand," she tells TRT Afrika.
Itumeleng has since undergone 104 corrective surgeries, the last of which was at 15. The physical and mental scars may not have disappeared, but the now 35-year-old woman has made peace with her reality after battling self-esteem issues and other mental health concerns for years.
"I was nine when a boy in my class told me I looked like burnt meat. Until then, I saw myself as the clever kid in class and was pretty confident," she says.
"I always knew that the fire had left me scarred, but I didn't quite realise how badly until the boy uttered those words."
The cruel jibe triggered a 10-year wave of depression that left deep marks and unpleasant memories.
Regaining control
As she went through self-pity, little did Itumeleng know that a spiritual awakening and psychological help would free her from depression.
Itumeleng delved deeply into numerous texts, including books by motivational speakers, and made a life-changing discovery.
"I discovered that every single person has scars. Mine are physical, but many people have invisible scars within. Many people cannot move past these scars because they don't have someone to show them how to do it," she tells TRT Afrika.
"I realised that I went through my wounds and scars because my purpose is to bring hope and healing to other people."
Her purpose gradually manifested itself in a career in motivational speaking, leading to an opportunity to become a brand ambassador for Dove Unilever in 2015.
She would travel to schools and corporate spaces across South Africa and beyond to inspire others. She also established the Itumeleng Sekhu Foundation, which works with 250 schools, providing stationery and sanitary products to young students in South Africa.
"My motivational speaking has taken me to Kenya and Seychelles, which is amazing because I have been able to inspire many young boys and girls on issues to do with self-esteem, self-love and leadership," says the now mother of three.
Global outlook
In 2014, Itumeleng wrote a book titled What Do You See, which tackles concepts of self-acceptance.
"It took me two years to write my book because I had to tap back into the emotions I felt when I wanted to die by suicide. I didn't want to go back there again, but when the book was done, I realised that it was what I needed to do as my final step in healing my emotional scars," she says.
According to the World Health Organisation (WHO), children account for 42% of reported burn injuries worldwide.
Fatalities caused by burns in low and middle-income countries are 11 times higher than in high-income nations, with an estimated 43,000 people dying of burns in Africa every year. At six deaths for every cluster of 100,000 people, that's a staggering count.
Overcoming phobia
As in Itumeleng's case, the most vulnerable group are children aged one to five.
Catharsis works in strange ways. In 2018, Itumeleng realised she had one more scar she needed to heal – a deep fear of candles.
"I never liked candles and avoided them and other hot things like gas heaters and stoves. My inner child recognised that these were things that could, at any time, harm me, so I was still very fearful," she recalls.
"Even today, my mum does not use candles, gas stoves or heaters because she is still traumatised by what happened to me."
One day, Itumeleng asked herself, "How long will I allow this fear to imprison me?"
Shining bright
Being a motivational speaker, she realised it would be more convincing to tell people to reach their full potential while having overcome her fears.
Determined, she scoured YouTube for a step-by-step tutorial in candle-making. It was a decision she is proud of taking.
“I was shocked at how good they turned out – that I could make something so beautiful with just one hand and one finger. It changed my perspective of what it means to light up other people's lives without dimming my light in the process," she says.
What started as an experiment in overcoming fear became a successful business in five years.
"We have just released a new range of sculptured candles. They look beautiful, smell nice, and everybody loves them," says Itumeleng.
"I consider myself a burns 'victor', not a victim. That's because I know my purpose. Knowing why I am here has become greater than the fire accident itself. A candle tried to ruin me, but that very same candle lives within me and is shining bright."
